can you spare a square?

I awoke this morning, (as I do most mornings), to read an article that cracked even me up.

While reading the BBC headlines I came across one that I had to investigate: "Singer Sheryl Crow calls for loo paper limit to fight climate change".

Now while I have always considered myself a stout environmentalist - even years before it was considered "cool to be green" - I think this is a bit much. Ms. Crow is campaigning for the world to use less toilet paper...and I quote; using "only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required". Now I know that entertainers sit on the left side of the Lord but c'mon, 1-3 squares?? And what exactly are "pesky* occasions"? Is that what Missourians call taking a shit?

*pes·ky [pes-kee] –adjective, -ki·er, -ki·est. Informal. annoyingly troublesome: bothered by a pesky fly.

The only way I see that her campaign would work is if we all stopped eating. So I'm starting a new campaign - liquid diets for everyone! Just think, no more obesity - no more sad little children going to bed hungry - and best of all, think of all the money you'll save. Water is free! Hell, by my numbers, my $500 a month grocery budget would shrink by 75% by only purchasing Tang and milk.

Considering that a majority of TP is designed to deteriorate when wet in order to keep drainpipes clear, it doesn't all end up in landfills like say, tires. Perhaps she should be preaching walking everywhere. And what about all the fuel she and her entourage use while touring? There are many other consumer products that we could all be consciously conserving while not destroying our planet. The only one that crosses all genders, economics, races and religions doesn't have to be one of them.

Since I do not foresee purchasing a bidet any time soon, I suggest using Seventh Generation Bath Tissue. It's made from 100% recycled paper, with a minimum of 80% post-consumer materials used in its manufacturing.

roker calls for imus' head

I was flipping through the channels one morn a few months ago and came upon 'Imus In The Morning'. The few minutes I watched his program confirmed what I knew to be true for me, I don't care for him, nor his ideas. Know what I did? I changed the channel. (I think it's funny he calls his show comedic...the only thing funny I saw was his hat!)

In today's society we are so quick to judge and, in a sense, force our beliefs and opinions on others, that we forget one of the most beautiful things about our country, we all have choices. I feel it is hypocritical to judge one based on their opinions - no matter how horrific they may appear to us - because we want a sterile society. Just because you think someone is offensive, they should be silenced. In no way am I justifying what he said. It was offensive and rude - but Imus doesn't need to apologize to the black community, he needs to apologize to the ladies who he derogated.

I like you Al. I really do. I am a loyal watcher of the Today Show and think you've come a long way in your career. And just like Mr. Imus, you have every right to voice your opinion. Some may agree and some may not. As it states in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights - Article 19: "Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers." There's nothing in there that states we all have to like what we hear and/or see. There are so many more pertinent issues in our society, in my opinion, that fall to the wayside to make room for petty arguments that, in the end, harkens back to schoolyard tantrums of "you hurt my feelings".

Toughen up America…and keep your finger poised above your remotes. It's your right.